I feel like a bit of a fraud.
I made such an effort to lose all that weight and get fit, and yet I'm only really just hanging on to it by the skin of my teeth.
Quick recap:
Turned 40 in 2005, weighing just over 132kg
Started WW in April 2005
Did a triathlon in February 2006
Lost 50kg by April 2006
Got down to 76kg (very briefly) in October 2006
Since then my weight has slowly crept up so I am now at 89kg
I just don't seem to be able to keep any momentum. Yes, I am still pretty fit, but my eating is all over the place.
Discipline is very clearly part of the answer - and given all the personal changes I've been through in the past few years (only child leaving home, my leaving my long-term partner, me falling head over heels in love with a new man...), I suspect there's some emotional stuff tied up in that.
I know that setting goals and making plans is something that makes a big difference to me. It's very easy for me to just drift along if I'm not aiming for something.
Discipline affects so much of what I do. My work, my home life, my health and my emotional well being. Going easy on myself should not be an option - it doesn't help me in the long run. I let myself off the hook when my weight wandered up over 80kg, then up and down and up again and again over 85kg. I cannot continue to do this, or next it will be over 90kg and who knows where that will stop (or not stop).
So, how am I bounding back into action?
First - I have signed up for another triathlon (6 February 2010). Yes, I know said last year I had retired from running, but I can change my mind about that one. This triathlon is about two things - one is to have a goal. The other thing is in my first triathlon the weather was so vile the swim was cancelled (we waded through the waves instead), so I've always kinda felt I didn't really do a triathlon.
Second - the return of regular posts. This is to keep me on track, not for the entertainment of others. Just weekly posts, but every week. Maybe more than once a week, but never less.
Third - eating. I still haven't got my head around how to cope with this. I know I can't go back to counting points or any other form of tracking; this doesn't work for me and is more likely to make me eat poorly after a few days. It is partly about setting limits and partly about doing some planning. I'll put more thought into this yet, but it starts with no alcohol during the week and planning at least my breakfasts and lunches. Dinner will be less formal but will certainly involve restrictions on the size of protein servings.
And the end goal? Same as always - 72kg.
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4 comments:
I can relate to this post so much for different reasons. I know going through what we are that I could throw all my hard work aside. You've gone through lot of changes in your life. I know weight shouldn't be an issue with me, but it is even for health reasons alone. I couldn't go back to tracking, makes me realise how "over the top" I used to be.
So easy when you are motivated, heading on donewards, into exercise etc. So hard when the motivation goes and the weight loss start to reverse!
As always it sounds like you have got your plans on how to change things for you. Good luck!
Sorry - bit of a rambling comment - I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.
Yes you can never really take your eye off the ball - but unlike you and Anne I find tracking helps me get the focus back and alerts me to all the little bits that have been sneaking in - any one or two on their own - no big deal but when there's a whole lot of them it's a different story. I do find that posting regularly and being honest about how I've gone helps me a lot too. Look forward to seeing you around regularly Zxx
Welcome back! Have missed you. Im with you with tracking - I really want to but know I cant. Cant keep it up for more than a couple of days and then it adds to my feelings of failure. Im on a no alcohol during the week again too and boy was day one hard - nearly relented. LOL hopeless.
Good luck with goals - I'll be walking with you.
xxx
You are fitter & happier than you were, that is more important then the numbers on the scale.
I am sure a few small changes will have your weight where y ou want it in no time.
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